Before I entered the By Design program, I found myself at a crossroads in my art. I was having difficulty creating any one single piece of work I would accept as finished. Nothing I did seemed adequate to express the ideas I was trying to convey.. All my ideas took the form of stories and I couldn't find a way to condense my stories into a single drawing. Being introduced to Book Arts was like a fog being lifted. By putting my art into books I no longer had to condense my ideas onto a single sheet of paper. I could now use multiple drawings and multiple pages to tell a story and still have a single cohesive piece of art as the end product. Of course as soon as I made that connection I began seeing illustration and comics as beautiful new ways of telling my stories.
I try to use art and comics as a method of self-examination. I developed myself as a character in my art as a way for me to discover more about who I really am. For this project I focus on two instances that I feel show something significant about my personality. In my first story I feel alienated form the rest of the partygoers, unable, and perhaps unwilling, to to make any efforts towards communication. I am too caught up in neuroses about whether it is even worth it to try and communicate in this environment that part of me wants to be a part of, yet another part feels is superficial and not worth my time. Am I too snobby? Is this just a case of sour grapes? Do I just want to fit in? I tried to convey the wide range of emotions and ideas I went through in the course of the evening to try to answer some of those questions.
I want to thanks my mentor Chandler O'Leary who was so helpful in shaping the way an inexperienced comic book artist thought about comics. She taught me about controlling the eyes of the viewers and affecting the way they look at my books- things that I never could have begun to think of on my own. The ideas and methods she gave me were invaluable to the completion of this project.